Dear Straight People

Dear every single straight guy who ever came on to me,

Why must I be gay? For the same reason you’re so obnoxious.

It’s not a “waste” that I’m gay. I don’t exist for you. Fuck you.

Dear Straight Men,

Stop saying, “Oh, I’m very okay with that,” or “Oh, that’s hot,” when I tell you I have a girlfriend. I am not responsible, nor do I - in any way - want to take part in - your orgasms. That’s why I have a girlfriend. Stop treating me like I’m pornography. I am a person.

Dear Straight People, I do not care if you call yourself an ally or not. It is not your place to...

Dear Straight People,

I do not care if you call yourself an ally or not. It is not your place to tell us that you love everyone, including homophobes. It is especially not your place to tell us that we should do the same.

Please stop.

Dear Straight People,

JUST BECAUSE I AM ATTRACTED TO GIRLS DOES NOT MEAN I AM ATTRACTED TO YOU.

NOR DOES IT MEAN I WANT TO BE IN A THREESOME WITH YOU.

OR THAT COMING ON TO ME IS OKAY BECAUSE YOU’RE STRAIGHT.

GET OVER YOURSELF.

I DON’T WANT TO FUCK YOU.

Dear straight people,

if you feel you can’t relate to non-hetero characters in media, how the hell do you think I feel most of the time? Almost all of the things I’m interested in tend to be hetero-dominated.

Dear Straight Former "Friends"

Hearing a rumor that I “got handsy” with a girl you assumed was straight at a party?
Not an okay reason to spread rumors about me and NOT an okay reason to ignore/ passive-aggressively mock me.
Now I remember why I never told you I was dating someone.
Regardless, dancing with a girl at a party doesn’t make me “oversexed” or “out of control” and TRUST ME I am not about to make a move on any of you unfortunate-looking bitches.
You don’t care what losers anyone else dates, as long as they’re male losers.
Oh, and by the way? She came on to me. SORRY I’M NOT THE ONLY QUEER PERSON THAT EXISTS.
Now I know why I was so afraid to come out to you— maybe because you’ve been making dyke jokes about me for years, since before I even knew I was a lesbian.
Sincerely,
You’re obviously jealous because you can’t get laid so why don’t you all go fuck yourselves. I’m better off without you anyway.

Dear Straight People,

I am terrified of you. And I know that not all of you are homophobic, and that very few of you would actually physically attack me if I came out to you, but I am scared none the less. I survive by being scared. So know that when I say “I fucking hate straight people” it’s because I literally live my day-to-day life in fear of you, and that it makes me feel strong, and safe, to talk about how much I hate straight people. And until I live in an environment where I don’t have to be afraid, I will continue to do so. Sorrybut really not. - a 14 year old queer girl who is tired of being scared

Dear straight women at work

Don’t worry, you’re safe from my predatory lesbian claws. I’ll try to keep myself under control in the presence of your overwhelming hotness. And if you wash your hands with sanitizer afterwards you won’t catch teh gay.

Seriously, there’s no need to move your chair aside when I sit next to you in the canteen. You’ll be fine even if you don’t maintain an exact 60cm of room between us, I promise. You can shake my hand, too, touching your bare skin won’t send me in a frenzy of lust.

If you thought I wouldn’t notice how much your behaviour changed when you learned I had a girlfriend, and if you think I can’t hear you when you whisper behind my back, you are 100% wrong.

Dear Fellow Straight Students

The fact that im bisexual doesnt mean i want to fuck half the school, that just because one of my friends who happens to also be bi - of whom i love to bits platonically at the moment - doesnt mean im screwing her or that i get off seeing other girls getting changed in pe. i know you like to make out how much of ‘slutty wreck’ ive become since nursery school because i have problems at home and in my head and ive always been a ‘problem teen’ but being bi isnt some sort of side effect from all that, if anything i hope if i meet a decent person regardless of who they identify themselves as and whether they just want to frick or something more committed and long term by then maybe ill be much happier just being with them.

p.s PFFT I CANT BELIEVE YOU ASKED ME IF BEING BI  MEANT I WOULD WANT TO SHAG HALF THE SCHOOL YOU ALL LOOK LIKE STUBBY FEET AND TRUST ME HAVING TO SIT THERE WHILE YOU GET CHANGED IS NO PLEASURABLE EXPERIENCE HAHAHAHAHAHAH GOD NO OH DEAR get your head out your ass <3

Dear Straigh "Ally",

Just because you previously assumed that someone in the closet was gay and were correct when they came out does not mean you have “gaydar”.  ”Gaydar” is a piece of stereotyping bullshit.  Assuming that people are gay because of the way they act, dress, or speak is not having “insight” or “knowledge”.  It is being a stereotyping piece of bullshit.  Now shut up.

Dear Dad: If you tell me one more time that you don’t care about a person’s sexual or...

Dear Dad:

If you tell me one more time that you don’t care about a person’s sexual or gender orientation because that’s not your business but then talk about how marriage equality would destroy the ‘traditional family’ and ‘traditional values’ and marriage as a whole, and if you tell me one more time about how the people you worked for wouldn’t let you go to a prayer circle on their time but would let people go to a LGBT*+ pride/education event on the company’s time and how that was ~*so wrong*~ and ~*so oppressive*~ that homophobia simply can’t exist, and if you dare to hide behind your lesbian aunt and her partner, I will either go and get your divorce papers and shove them right back in your face and let you talk about ‘traditional values’ and a ‘nuclear family’, or I will get my stuff, walk out, get in my car, and drive back to my home, because I refuse to keep trying to educate you and get you to see the bigger picture and I can’t be in an environment where you don’t make me feel safe or like I can be open and myself around you. Believe me when I say, that would hurt me more than it would hurt you, because I really want to have a good relationship with you, but right now I can’t.

ps: Yelling at me about how all LGBT*+ people are going to hell and then asking me to come out to you when I start crying is not going to make me want to tell you shit or foster any sort of parent-child trust between us.

Dear Straight People, I know you’re trying to be nice when you say you’re “happy...

Dear Straight People,

I know you’re trying to be nice when you say you’re “happy I’m beginning to accept myself,” but I’ve never had trouble with that. What I have a hard time accepting is the ways in which you feel the need to treat me differently once you know I’m queer.

Dear Mom

No, this is not a phase. No, I will not be embarrassed about this later even if it is. No, I won’t ever want to be employed by a homophobe, so I think I’m safe with showing a little pride on Facebook. If I’m old enough to be expected to know what I want to do with the rest of my life, I think I’m old enough to know my sexuality.

Dear straight teacher,

You asked me to draw my dream wedding, and I did. Just because there are two women getting married does not make it “inappropriate for school.”

Dear Straight Mum...

You saying you “don’t like what’s happening to me” is fucking painful. I’m  actually not sorry that I’m fabulously queer, and I’m never gonna deny it. Stop trying to hide it from everyone (especially grandma) as if it’s something to be ashamed of!

Oh, and I’m your SON, NOT your daughter!

(ok ranty rant over :3)

dear straight people

we have ONE queer bar in this town and 30-40 unspecified (read: straight) pubs. but you choose to come to the queer one exclusively? go away, we don’t want you here. we don’t want your offense when we ask you to dance or your casual slurs thrown at us.

Dear Straight White girls at the gay club

Literally this is a club to have fun and let loose. There is no point to you asking me if I’m gay/bi or straight? I’m here to have fun, stop treating this like a shopping mall for a new gay accessory and go dance like everyone else.

Sincerely, A Pansexual guy who won’t tell you my sexuality because you’ll just say I’m gay.

Dear straight friend,

I appreciate that you see me as a queer guy. But don’t call me a fag all the time. It isn’t cute. It makes me uncomfortable. Please stop.

Dear Straight People,

Please stop quoting “born this way” and saying “I can’t help it” or “its not a choice”.
There is no proof that LGBTQA people are actually “born this way”, and assuming that we were has its own implications.
And even if it IS a choice, so fucking what? Religious expression is a choice, and religious prosecution is still a crime.

Dear Straight People,

It’s not cutesy or light-hearted at all when you try to kiss us or fuck us even though we told you we are only interested in our own gender. Actually, it’s pretty damn close to sexual harassment.